A long, long time ago, at the beginning of academic year 0809 semester 1, in the C block of SHeares, on the godforsaken lands of NUS, there lived 4…cute seniors (one was a frequent guest). Unfortunately, because they were “seniors” and hence of little ogle value to the shallow, red-blooded male species of the land, they were relegated to a solitary retreat in an inconspicuous portion of the estate.
Nevertheless, life was simple and life was good. Among them, they sang, they skipped, they binged, they mugged, they laughed, they slacked, they danced…you get the idea. While the skirt-chasers of the land chased (young) skirts, they had reclusive suppers, rolled on each other’s beds, and filmed incriminating videos of one another in the toilet (brushing teeth!).
Then one fine day, a gang of skirt-chasers stumbled accidentally upon these (cute!) forgotten creatures of the land! Alas! These shallow skirt-chasers have long since had their visions dulled and wits dimmed. When their eyes fell upon these cute! creatures of the land, their bovine faculties could not register beauty and goodness. Scathed by the radiance of these gentle creatures, they drew back in revulsion and screeched terribly. They scampered like hacked crocodiles away from the bewildered (cute!) creatures.
As they recuperated back in their lairs, they passed on, erroneously, the horrors of the forgotten creatures in their mysterious and obscure retreats. Uncertain what to make of these (cute!) creatures and hampered by deteriorating creativity, they called these wonderful creatures ‘cavemen’ in their vastly inaccurate tales of the untrespassed.
Cavemen! We changed it to ‘Cavewomen’ in our discourse, of course (: Like I said, dull-wits couldn’t differentiate female from male. For dramatic literary purposes, the intellect and respectability of the male species of the land were slightly compromised. Most of them are nice. Hmm.